It was just a dream...

(This was written between the hour of 9AM and 10:30AM today.)

I woke up not too long ago to find Maddie's obnoxiously loud alarm clock, frantic and confused. The music was so loud I couldn't hear my own thoughts. And to think, she slept right through it! After she turned it off, I remembered that I had just woken up from a dream, and what a raunchy dream it was!

After stepping out of the bathroom from brushing my teeth, something reminds me of my dream. There he is, coming up from the stairwell... the man in my dreams.

It had occurred to me that I had made out intensely with a man. And who was that man? No one else but the person I've been talking about in my previous posts. From what I remember, we had made out. The sad part is that I don't really remember what exactly happened.

(I'm actually in my Anthro discussion writing this the old fashion way. I didn't want to lug my netbook around. We just did a class activity and I was Buffy the Vampire Slayer.)

Anyways, I'm in Soc now. Raf skipped class, so I'm alone. So back to my dream, the only thing I remembered was making out with him. My friends were in it too and they were rooting for me to go to him whenever he was out of my presence. They pushed me to go back to him, but knowing me there was some internetal conflict going on. I wasn't completely sure of him, but because of peer pressure, I gave in. I mean, it was fun. I had a good time.

I just can't believe I saw him at that hour in the day. I mean, it was a bit after 8AM and he's never up at that time of day. Never. He usually wakes up at noon or past noon. It was nice though. If it weren't for him, I wouldn't have remembered anything from my dream. I had a good morning.


(Now.)

After coming home from classes today, I went to the bathroom and once I stepped out, I went to his room. It took me a while to realize that he was putting clothes in his bag. I asked if he was leaving for the weekend and sadly, he was. He left so suddenly, but I'm glad I got to see him for the time being.

I thought about him some more after dinner and I've realized that I do like him. I do. I guess I just have relationship problems... commitment issues. It makes me afraid of getting into relationships. I admit it. I'm afraid of being with someone and ruining a good friendship. Well... I just have a feeling that I would ruin a friendship, break a heart, and get my heart broken. I have a tendency to do that.

Anyways, there's like 13 people in my room and I'm in my own little bubble right now. I think it's time to go. Update later in the AM, maybe.